Thursday, March 23, 2006

One of my least favourite things is having my picture really is. Reality sucks sometimes. There's times I'll see a pic of myself and am completely shocked how fluffy I really am..okay so fluffy is not a great description, i'm outright fat! But I really love me just got to get rid of Pen 2, lol.

I've decided to post a few pics of myself although full on shots are on the main computer but here goes.....

15 years ago in Cape time flies!

This ones 4 years ago on the Skeena River...we usually go there for a yearly fishing trip for Springs, it's always so much fun.
Here's our nephew Matt, he came and stayed with us two summers ago for 6 weeks and had so much fun. We were camping at Lakelse, he had a great time boating, playing in the water, roasting marshmallows and hot dogs, investigating and letting loose.

A little over a year ago I decided to go with something completely different and break away from the comfort zone. WOW, it took a bit to get used to but I loved it. Change is good, wakes you up and helps you feel alive.

Pictures tell a story all their own, you can see so much in a single shot. Photography is one course I would love to take. Have to stop with the wishing and just start doing. Jenny had such an amazing picture that her or Scott had taken and put it on a card for Shari to have from each of us in the girls group with the beads.

Sunday, March 19, 2006


okay, so we'll be doing the big move next weekend but it seems like life is on hold in the meantime. I do little dribs and drabs of moving over the small stuff but my patience is wearing thing! I want to be in our home NOW!! Horrible of me to feel this way as Hal's been really busy with work and moving stuff over after work plus fighting off whatever virus is going around.

It's only one week but it feels like a lifetime. Honestly don't know why i'm so impatient as the real work begins once everything is moved. Putting things away, arranging stuff, pictures, etc. but I guess it's that right now nothing can really be put away until the big stuff arrives.

As I sit here grumbling about impatience I realize it's 11:15 a.m. and I'M STILL IN MY JAMMIES!! lol. However, laundry is on the go and the shower is calling out loudly. Today i'm taking over clothes we don't wear on a regular basis (HELLO HAL...this is for you, love of my life. IF YOU HAVEN'T WORN IT IN TWO YEARS YOU PROBABLY WILL NEVER WEAR IT! Love ya, mean it!)

okay, switching laundry, hitting the shower and going to make brunch for us before I head out.

Happy sunday all.

1. Sag, you're it
2. Pin the toupee on the bald guy.
3. 20 questions shouted into your good ear
4. Kick the bucket
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over
6. Doc Goose
7. Simon says something incoherent.
8. Hide and Go Pee
9. Spin the Bottle of Mylanta.
10. Musical Recliners

Saturday, March 18, 2006

At the Rainbow Bridge

It's been two years today since we've said goodbye to Halen. He was the most amazing dog we've ever owned and letting him go was the easiest and most difficult thing we've had to do. He was in pain and unable to get up and move about like he used to. He would look forlornly at his soccer ball knowing all to well those days were gone by. Halen was an awesome goalie and loved to play soccer with the kids. He was also a great fisherdog too.....boy when Dad would throw that fly he sure did try to catch it and bring it back to him. He could never quite figure out why Dad would scold him for it though, he was just helping.

Hal and I knew that after 11 years our boy had lived a good life and that out of respect, love and appreciation for all he had done and been for us it was only fair that we stop being selfish and start being selfless by letting him go. Arthritis and cancer had taken over and there was not much that could be done for Halen.

We decided the week before he went to the Bridge we would give him all the belly skritches, meaty bones, couch cuddles, truck rides wherever we went, visits with family and friends to say good bye and most of all talking to him with gentle, loving words and stroking of his ears and tummy that he loved so much. I swear he knew when the day came. Hal was questioning our decision and you could tell it was tearing him up inside. "Maybe tomorrow will be better, Summers not far away and the warmer weather will help!" It was then that Halen gave a sign, he was trying so hard to get up and let out such a mournful yelp. The look in his eyes said it all. We didn't cry on the way to the vet and we held strong while they did what they do. Hal held Halens head in his hands and we quietly said "Love you Pooh Bear, you've got family waiting to see you" With a kiss and an ear rub and what seemed the blink of an eye our boy was gone to the other side. We couldn't believe it was so quick but he was free from the pain that had robbed him of his playful life.

I miss you Brown Bum Bear but I know the game goes on and the Bridge sure got one heckuva goalie. Play on Pooh Bear, Play on!


If it should be that I grow weak,
And the pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won,

You will be sad, I understand,
Don't let your grief then stay your hand,
For this day more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years,
What is to come can hold no fears,
You'd not want me to suffer so,
The time has come to let me go.

Take me where my needs they'll tend,
And please stay with me until the end,
I know in time that you will see,
The kindness in what you have done for me,

Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.
Please do not grieve,
it must be you,
Who has this painful thing to do,
We've been so close, we three, these years,
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

I am....

A sister, a friend, a lover and an Auntie
but above all I am a woman who tries to live a life that I can look back on and say..
Wow, what a life and i'm proud to be me!

Very self-centered some may say but after reading Shari's blog and realizing that too often we lose ourselves worrying about shoulda, coulda, woulda...LIVE LIFE NOW! Don't forget to laugh when you want to cry or hell just cry and then laugh.

Not sure about you others in blog land but who has a tough time accepting compliments? Why do we belittle what others say about us or just scoff at it? I honestly don't know how to accept a compliment partly because I don't see/believe what the complement is for and partly because I don't want to sound stuck up/arrogant.

I'm very tired and rambling tonight but just want us to love ourselves, our families, our friends and to embrace the lives we lead and enjoy the moment.

off to dreamland and to float around those stars that shine so brightly,
Hugs to all, Pen

Friday, March 10, 2006

So much shit!!

omg, Hal and I moved over two truckloads of boxes tonight and it seemed like so much. I walk in the house tonight and it doesn't even look like anythings gone yet! I guess we realized just how much crap we had and are really trying to pick and choose what we'll keep and what we'll sell in a garage sale. However, Hal is really quick to say what of mine should go yet when any of his stuff is mentioned there's a 'valid' reason why he needs it. Hal needs to go on a mini holiday, lol.

We're excited and anxious now to get it all done. Hal surprised me tonight by agreeing to painting the bedroom and the rec room. He really thinks the sage green will look nice in the bedroom and he'd like to paint the rec room main wall a deeper colour. This is coming from a guy who normally could care less so long as he's got a couch to lay on and a remote in his hand! I love my hunny! He's throwing out all these things he wants to do so he's going to need a list to remember them all.....I have a feeling though that this will wear off really quick.

Living in clutter and disarray drives me nuts, nuts, nuts!! Hal told me to get over it and we'll make do for the next few weeks but tomorrow morning this shack gets a going over, we still need to live here for almost 3 weeks and the real estate guy is coming in on Monday to take pics to list this for our landlord. Our landlord is known as 'DickSmack'. The guy is a total butt and we can't wait to be done with renting.

Work has been good, wish I could take a weeks holidays but not gonna happen.

Here's to SS's and good friends! Chow for now,

Saturday, March 4, 2006

Medicated Stupor

Last night:
Turns out there was a bit more then a head cold going on...tonsillitis and ear infection...could that have caused sleeplessness?? Went to the dr. and told him that my left ear was a bit plugged and throat was kinda sore. He looks in the ear and says "A bit plugged? How long has your ear been bothering you?" I tell him it just hurt a bit the last two days and then it didn't hurt anymore but couldn't hear now. Turns out that'll happen when you let an infection go on too long..but if you didn't know it was infected cuz it had only started hurting two days before what ya gonna do? Two prescriptions and a bottle of Tylenol later I head home under Dr's advice to drink and rest as much as possible. Got a hearty laugh and a 'definitely not' from him when I asked if Rum and Coke or coffee and Irish cream were included in that 'drink lots'.

Anywho, I'm bummed because the girls are having readings done tonight and getting together. I really do hope they all have a wonderful time!! Glad I didn't go though as my fever is still at 102 and really...who wants some germ infested freak hanging out sharing the same breathing space?

Tomorrow will be spent slicin' and dicin' potatoes and onions for scalloped potatoes. Hal said he'll help cuz afterall it is for his hockey team, lol. He can be such a doll and even though the phone ringing yesterday was driving me crazy it was sweet that he was calling to "Just seein' how you are babe, want me to bring anything home?" He even called tonight from the hockey game to see how I was doing and to say that he would leave the truck at the rink and get home by other means. *so sometimes he does really listen, lol.

This morning the ear is still plugged but fever broke around 4 a.m. and actually got about 5 hours sleep last night. Feeling a bit daunted by the whole scalloped potato job but we've decided that since only one of the turkey sized roaster pans will fit in the oven we're going to make one very big pan of them. I'm going to watch Hal's game at 1:00 and then home to have a nap and get ready for tonight. It will be an early night but still going to go for a bit.


Friday, March 3, 2006

Okay, here we go again!! Perhaps it's not just the cold keeping me awake at night, I think insommnia is back with a vengeance. 8:30 tonight it was all I could do to stay awake but managed to until 10:30 p.m. Sleep came fast but woke up at 11:45 feeling like it had been an entire nights sleep and shocked that it was only 11:45, surely I messed up the settings on the night stand clock. Been there, done that but not a chance. Lay in bed until 12:30 and think this is crazy stuff..wth am I doing awake?

From childhood on if something was bugging me (whether I knew it or not) I could be awake all night long. It was Dad who decided that drawing or writing during these times would be good, well stick men was the extent of drawing skills and I found solace in writing. Even though what's got my thinker thinking may not come out on paper, or now on the computer, it helps.

Some things i'm sure contributing to this sudden nightowl behaviour are:

New home and the move
Work situation
Missing my sister and nephews terribly right now
Will the left and right nostril ever work together again (had to throw some humour in their or I was gonna cry)
Landlord is like ExLax, he irritates the crap out of me and can't wait to be done with him

k, going to make some Wildberry tea and try to unwind a bit more.
Blog on,

Thursday, March 2, 2006

Breathing is a good thing....right??

I've lost my longer Pen but now 4 of the seven dwarves: Sleepy, Sneezy, Dopey and Grumpy!

Good lord I love Hal but this cold he shared that has me unable to breathe or sleep is making me reconsider how much I do love him, lol. Hun, share the good things but keep your germs to yourself!

Tuesday night I had about 4 hours sleep and let's see about last night....went to bed at 1 a.m. up at 3 a.m. back to bed at 5 and up at 6 a.m. oooohhhh 3.5 hours and i'm grumpy, grumpy, grumpy....thank goodness work starts at 1 p.m. so after Hal gets up I'll be able to go back to bed again for a bit. Nothing is working for this intensely sore throat, stuffed head and aching body. Fever and chills have me rolling up like a sausage roll in the duvet one minute and the next I can't unroll fast enough and the sweat is pouring off.

I felt guilty for canning on Shari and the gym yesterday but am wiped out and now today feel totally exhausted. Hal has a hockey tourney this weekend and we've got our girls group tomorrow night so it's off to the pharmacy for some different drugs.

Off to have a hot shower and rub vicks all over and snuggle up with Cleo.