So much happening and the days fly by!

Wow, there's such a mix of good, bad and some just plain sad. The good stuff - the new payroll position is now officially mine. Deborah's last day was today and it's sort of a mixed bag of emotions. Starting something new is scary, whether a new job or retirement. I honestly don't know how it would be to go from working 40+ hours a week to suddenly having days to yourself. Yes, granted it would be enjoyable at first but then what? Starting a new position - am I ready?? Well I guess it's a matter of time. Deborah has left some pretty big shoes to fill and that in itself is intimidating, lol. When one has been in a position for such a length of time it truly is hard to pass on all that you know, heck there's things that are so much a part of your day that you don't even realize you've done it. (hope that made sense).

The bad - FINANCES!! Sheesh, cut us some slack already!!! Hot water tank, house insurance, intake manifold on the truck, vet bills from Cleo plus regular monthly bills and groceries. You know I'm not greedy cuz really $250,000.00 would be sweet, hell for that matter $25,000 would be awesome too. I know these aren't expenses that come up all the time, we've been lucky but holy shit all at once these came up and I hate the whole money issue.

The sad - a dear co-worker is dying of cancer. Suzanne has the most amazing laugh! I tell you, she'd laugh downstairs at work and it was guaranteed to make each of us smile and giggle. It hasn't been the same since she's been gone. Gary is facing one tough road and I won't begin to say I understand. Their love story warms my heart and at the same time tears it in two. They were robbed of a long life together. Please keep them both in your prayers, these are two very special people.

Shari too has just lost her Dad. It's never easy to lose your parent no matter how old you may be, especially if you're a 'Daddy's girl'. It's always hard to find the right words or to remember to just be quiet and listen. I'm thinking of you Shari and can only say "there is no set timeline for grieving, remember to just be" Hugs and love to you dear friend!


On the same note we've lost another friend to cancer. Sylvia was so young, she leaves behind her husband Andrew (works with Hal at OWT) and their 6 year old daughter. Sylvia was another remarkable woman - she always took the time to listen, was quick to smile, laugh and she treated those around her as equals.

The happy - Gibson, Hal, Family and Friends!! There is so much to be thankful and happy for. I'm not one to relish in other peoples misfortune and to see what friends are going through right now really puts life into perspective!

Gibby is a cat chasing, kid lovin', car ridin', plant eatin' holy terror!! Wow, miss a walk with that boy and wooo hoooo, the living room, hallway and kitchen become the Indy 500 track! He's amazing and we're both so in love with him. Here are some of the newest pictures of him when Parker came for a sleepover with Auntie and Uncle.

Pictures of our boy Gibson

Wow, I can't believe what a difference a puppy can make. Hal and I are both very happy and the house seems alive again. I was thinking back to when Cleo was first sick in November and how things really hadn't been the same since then.

I still deal with guilt about not having her put to sleep sooner but the reality is that we didn't know it was Kidney disease. We thought it was the Spondylosis (sp) and the fracture on her back. I do find comfort knowing that she is now at peace and no longer suffering any pain. We still miss her cuddles and her singing when we come home and the way she would always greet us with one of her special babies.

Here, though, is the new bright spot in our life and what a happy little boy he is. We decided on the name Gibson for a few reasons. First being that little kids would quite often say something else, we didn't want him to only come when called "Tucker, you little f$%@&r" hehehe. Gibson makes me think of Guitars and in turn lots of good memories. For Hal, thinking after we had him named, that his Aunt totally adored Mel Gibson. Have to admit that I didn't even think of Mel when we thought of Gibson, lol.

Anywhooo, here is our Mr. Gibson Boy

Adding to our family

As most of you know we are adding a lab puppy to our household this weekend. As much as I'm so excited and happy to have the sound of little feet, the smell of puppy breath and a loyal companion I am terrified that something will be wrong with him.

We have had no luck with our furbabies in the last little bit. I guess that's not quite right - Cleo was older, but still not old enough and Quade was a pup. In no way is this to replace our other babies, you can't possibly. But it's still worrisome "will his hips be okay? will he have any other medical conditions that may take him from us? how long will we have him?" As with anything in life there is no guarantee and we can only love him and keep him safe and healthy as we possibly can. Other then that it's in God's hands.

Hal has been asking about Hip certification, overall health of parents, etc. Really when you look at some of the great breedings out there it's all a frigging gamble. I told him we lived it and we lost. His littermates are totally healthy and strong - it's a gamble. Then said "Perhaps we should call him Gamble because that's what it is." We aren't paying huge money for him, the lady said she just wants them to go to good homes. She basically would like to cover their Vet checkup/shots bill, travel/delivery.

We've selected Labs for their gregarious nature, sweet dispostion and the love of water and people. Thought that it would be a good fit with a Rotti pup should we get the replacement.

Any name ideas?

Thanks for listening to the whinefest too, have a wonderful day!

Spring has sprung!

It feels good this season they call Spring! It's a joyful time with the 'aliveness' of all the trees, animals and even us humans.

Hal and I are doing okay with the loss of Cleo, it wasn't as hard as we had anticipated because she was so ill and in a great deal of pain. We miss her funny antics and being greeted at the door when we come home. Have to say that is one of the hardest parts, the loneliness of an empty house knowing they aren't just away on a holiday.

The Relay for Life is this weekend and the weather is supposed to be decent but really if it rains the Relay will go on. Rather enlightening hmmm - Cancer doesn't stop because of a little rain so why should we.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful Spring too and enjoying this beautiful weather!
xo Pen

Here we go again

I'm sitting here bawling my eyes out and thinking 'Why?'

We are having Cleo put down on Monday evening, my poor girl has shrunk away to nothing and is suffering terribly. You see the pain in her eyes and I just wish she could tell me where it hurts. She's now lost almost 30 lbs and is a mere shadow of her former beautiful self. My girl with a heart full of love, eyes that speak volumes and her funny little nubbin is 8.5 years old and leaving us far too soon.

We don't really know what's causing the weightloss as her appetite picked up really well and she was eating three times a day but continued to lose weight. She drinks a lot but has no quality of life. It takes her 20 minutes just to go out and pee. Last night she staggered and started to fall over so I ran and grabbed her before she fell on the bricks, carried her inside and set her down. She was exhausted, panting in pain and out of sorts. We had called the Vet's office earlier in the week but the soonest they could get us in is Monday evening - this has been a good thing but soooo very difficult too. We get to spoil her for a few more days, snuggle with her and love her but what benefits us only causes her more time in pain.

We've been down this road only a short year ago and it's just way too soon. I say that we'll get another dog before we get the pup next spring but we'll see how the heart feels after Monday.

Off to pick my girlie up from the floor, take her to bed and cuddle with her for a little while longer. She's still so amazing though, try to not cry but they start out of the blue and she gives the gentlest kisses and nuzzles in a little closer. Perhaps I'm humanizing her but right now it's what this aching heart needs.

xo Pen

Hobbies

There are a few things I enjoy doing. Now this doesn't necessarily mean I'm good at them, lol. I'd called up Shari yesterday to see what she was up to in the evening and she had no plans to speak of so asked if she'd like to go out and take some pictures. She thought it would be nice to get out too, now we had no idea what we were going to make the subject of the photo shoot but would figure that out.

Sometimes it's nice to fly by the seat of your pants and not necessarily go looking for a particular thing but to sort of let it come to you. If you take a look to the right you'll see "Penz Photos", I've posted the pictures there from our night out.

It was a mini adventure and not that we did a lot of talking but it was nice to be in the company of a good friend and just be.

Thank you Shari for the Sunday night hang out!

Yay - Import and Export

I DID IT!!!! I've imported all the posts from the old template that I had. Back then there was no way that I could get it imported, had tried and tried but now blogger has an import/export feature that is soooo easy to use.

It's nice to have the history back here but now have to read through and see what may need to be deleted, lol.

I'm coming back to blogging as I miss it terribly. Making some changes, doing some housecleaning on here and will be back very soon!!!